daunting decade

well evelyn seems to have very little interest in walking without holding onto something. she will push her walker all day long like a champ but when you take it away from her will just stand for a few seconds but then decide to sit and crawl. she has ventured out to take 5 or 6 steps but ends up plopping back down. i just hope she is walking by mid june when all her cousins get here so she can walk around and follow them...much for fun than crawling....or maybe not, maybe crawling is just the greatest fun of all fun. what do i know, i gave up crawling decades ago...yes, decades.

speaking of decades, i am approaching my third decade in a few months. yikesabee. i really don't know what to think about this daunting decade that i am inching toward every.single.day. makes me think of john mayer's song, stop this train. if you haven't heard it you can HERE. the lyrics are fantastic.

Stop this train
I want to get off and go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't but honestly won't someone stop this train

So scared of getting older
I'm only good at being young
So I play the numbers game to find a way to say that life has just begun

to me, the true brilliance of the song follows the previous line:

Had a talk with my old man
Said help me understand
He said turn 68, you'll renegotiate
Don't stop this train
Don't for a minute change the place you're in
Don't think I couldn't ever understand
I tried my hand
John, honestly we'll never stop this train

i think it is easy for many to find themselves in the lyrics of this song. i know i have find myself lingering in the spaces where i do feel scared to get older because i've only ever been young...and i know how to be young. the thought of turning 30, or any number older, just feels like i'm placing another brick onto the accelerator...speeding faster and faster to what? to where? to the unknown.

looking back i do wonder where my 20s went and how they went so fast.  it may be a bit early for this, but here are some of the highlights of my 20s:

~ found my way to bryan college

~ met some of the most incredible people and forged some of the greatest friendships of my life

~ found myself

~ met my husband

~ graduated from bryan

~ married my husband

~ started a life with my husband

~ had evelyn

i would have to say all in all my 20s have been pretty kick ass. i guess there won't be any stopping this train. 30s...here i come.